Two nights ago I had the most bizarre dreams. I have to wonder if it was brought on by the Amoxicillin, or the Nilla Wafers I had just before bed. My brain has always been prone to odd twists, but they usually occur when I'm awake... and typically as a Niki-ism response to some outside input. Most of my dreams make sense... like everyday slices of time. Thursday night has me curious as to what the dream interpreters would make of me..... moooooo ha ha ha ha ha!
It started out semi-normal........ I found myself suddenly in the midst of a soccer game. I haven't played soccer in roughly 15 years, but being on the field still seemed to be a natural fit. What didn't fit, was that the ball was a can. A beer can. Bud Light. Why I recall this kind of detail is beyond me... but I do. I also dream in full color. Whomever it is that says humans dream only in black and white, isn't paying close enough attention. Sooooo... I'm kicking this beer can.... well... TRYING like hell to kick it. Do you ever have those dreams where you simply can't do something physical? Can't move a glass. Can't open a door. You just have no strength or control. That was the position I found myself in. SO frustrating. All my power into this kick... and... dink... the can moves about 11 inches. ARGH! To complicate things further, the scoring end of the field has large sand sculptures on it. Why? I dunno. Ask the Nilla Wafers. Apparently, they were there from a design competition the night before. Our game simply wasn't important enough to warrant clearing the field.
Anyway....... I made my way around the sand monuments (which were quite intricate!) with my Bud Light can... 4 inches at a step.... and got ready to take a shot on goal...... when I hear laughing behind me. I turn around to find that Chad and Andy (two folks I formerly worked with) were sitting in the bleachers, having a jolly time making fun of me. I turned back around, ignoring the two giddy bastards, to find that I was now in a gymnasium. What? Where did my goal go? Where's that darned Bud Light can? CRAP!
I'm not sure how I came to the conclusion that in order to score at this point in the dream, I was going to have to shoot a basketball into a hoop hanging directly over Chad and Andy. No problem.... except that, those darned Nilla Wafers placed some fat ducting in the gym ceiling, making the ball too thick to fit below the duct work, and above the rim of the hoop. Why? Professional complainer that I am.... I explained to Chad and Andy that this was an impossible task, and they would have to come up with a new way to earn points in this game.
It was at that moment, that Andy produced a skull shaped Halloween candy bucket from out of thin air. He somehow secured this bucket to his head, and tossed me a volleyball. The goal now was to shoot the volleyball into the bucket on top of Andy's head. Once I accomplished that task, I was allowed to go home. Excuse me? I'm now being held against my will in this gym? Yep. Those darned Nillas had me trapped!
I fired off about three shots.... missing every time... but coming close to pelting Andy in the nose... which was entertaining Chad to no end. Andy... being upset that Chad was now laughing at HIM, rather than me... decided to help "catch" the ball, by maneuvering his head under my shots. I finally managed to bounce one off the rim of the bucket, before Dierks Bentley commenced to starting his concert in the gym behind me. What? Really? Now Dierks is going to put on a show? Oh wait............ it's Blair Garner, "That's Dierks Bentley, getting a little Sideways on after midnite"........ and POOF.... I was awake.